Just Another Day in Paradise

well you'd be happy to know that we're still together, sometimes don't know why but we are, the other woman moved on and out of state - so here we are, trying to be a "normal" couple again although at times not sure what that is -- been a rough few months with the economy the way it is and I still have doubts each day as to what my role in this relationship is anymore -- often think about moving on or looking for someone else but don't have the drive for it right now -- I do love the person I'm with but at times I think you lower your expectations and settle for what is in front of you instead of seeking out a new individual with who you might find the kind of happiness you sometimes only dream of -- my life is half way over now and I want to look back in a few years and say this is where I wanted to be -- not sure at times how to achieve peace within myself but maybe one day I will just wake up and say , hey "i'm happy" and not want to look any further - I sure hope so, wish me well if you read this.

still perplexed

wish someone would tell me why women and probably men stay long after they should leave a relationship -- i go thru each day not sure if staying is the right thing to do - feel i'm being lied to but the other half will never admit it and just wants thing to go back to "normal" - wow , how can that be -- if i told you what i found out the other day, you would all laugh -- found an e-mail from my guy to another new "friend" giving her a totally different cell phone no. -- starts the distrust process all over again, really thinking this time about making a move sooner or later, i want someone who is going to love me, not just tell me because it's the thing to do, but love me and make me feel like i'm part of their life, holding hands, cuddling, feeling secure - i'm under such self imposed stress now that i've been given a mild tranquilizer for a better word by my dx, have shoulder pain and muscle tightness yet i go to work each day -- boy, do i miss having that someone special in my life, is he really out there? feel so bad to think that i would leave someone after almost 14 years but i'm lost and it's not getting any better. anyone have any thoughts out there, and i know you would say go, i'm trying but want the time to be right, actually i want that one wonderful man that i always thought would show up to find me, i sure have been looking for him.

new day

well even if no one is interested in hearing an old story at least i'm able to write it down where i can put it into diary form -- still having doubts about my other half but moving on with each day and hoping that the trust comes back into the relationship -- have to keep on trying

another day in a troubled relationship

been thru a lot this past year with my relationship -- found out that my partner had been cheating on me with a co-worker -- when i found out i was devastated and decided to do some detective work on my own -- eventually found out what was going on, who the woman was -- even after confronting the two of them it continued for months, she was a married woman and didn't care that she was ruining someone else's life -- i've given my other half three tries now and not sure even this time if he will be true -- anyone out there had the same problem, if so, what have you done about it and can you ever trust them again?